Sheperd

Making assumptions on what has been done by hearing it from second hand accounts. Missing the blessing for yourself, because you think it is better served from another mouth and not the Lords.
Know him for yourself, not through other people’s accounts, because you are just getting a story now, and not a blessing. You are watching the sick get healed, and remaining stagnate hoping for the same results. Faith comes from hearing, blessings come from work, not from osmosis. You can’t lay the bible under your pillow, out your head on the pillow and hope that what’s in it will filter up through the “barrier” you put up. Trying to get it your way, instead of his.
You want to know him, you want to receive God into your life. Open your Bible and seek him, get to know him, let him lead you, and you will get there. You will receive.
Faith is the evidence of things unseen, but you can’t have faith without trust. You can’t hear God if you don’t open your heart, and you can’t change your favor by doing the same thing that got you out of favor.
I didn’t get to know God by continuing to seek the approval of the world, I didn’t fix the strife in my life by standing in the same spot. Th Lord said move, and I finally did, he said come and I entered into his grace.
Look at what Mary did in faith, she trusted that her sorrow would become joy, her emptiness would be filled by trust, and she didn’t take it and try to hide like many of us do. She didn’t hold her miracle only to herself but she shared it with the world.
Why aren’t you taking your blessings, and sharing them with the lost, letting your Faith lead others out of the wilderness. Because in fellowship, their is strength. In fellowship their is growth, but in solitude, in the world, is loneliness, their is weakness and the devil will fool you and make you think you are stuck. But you are never stuck, because he never leaves you. God never abandons you, even when you walk away, he follows, he waits, he loves, he Grace’s you with favor, with mercy and continues to speak to your heart, letting you know, when you are ready, when you are done falling in the dark, he will turn on your light. He will guide you out, and into the promise Land.

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Giving

I’m stained with secrets
slowly burning with heat of sunrise
My heart lives there
between the echoed footsteps of goodbyes
My lips spill time uncontrollably
my tongue is chasing seconds
That pass memories in the dark
I’m filled with Faith
Raging with the joy of Resurrection
my soul lives here
Inside the tears of trials and triumphs
My voice carries a message that is everlasting
It is unconditional, it is love
-J

Dads matter

As time passes after my divorce I find myself more and more financially hurt.  I keep trying to figure why and then I sit down and write it all out. 

I am not a dead beat Dad, I show up to everything, whether it is my scheduled time or not.  I pay my child support, I pay activity fees and help with groceries and about 70% of my income goes to help mom pay for things with our babies.  That does not nor will it ever bother me, I Love my broken family (because divorce breaks a little of all us inside).  I want the best for my kids, even my ex-wife. 

What kills me is she wants more, she chooses to not work in the summer time.  She chooses to not sit down and budget with me for upcoming activities and expenses.  I just get a bill that keeps going and less and less information of where and when things are happening. 

Less and less.

I thought our job as parents (together or apart) was to do the best for our kids, for each other.  Imagine what we could do working together, just communicating.  The view changes with a simple conversation. 

This is scattered I know, just random free falling thoughts of a Dad….looking for ways to ask a Mom….to be better than our past by working together.

We all have bad moments in our life, but if you choose to remain in the position; you will never grow.  If you never grow, they never grow. 

Sigh, it just frazzles my mind on how to make things work, how to change things…how do we become better when we don’t exist.

Sincerely,

Dad moving forward